I Waited A Long Time: Going Deeper
Today was filled with insights into Cephas' mind. He's been quite overwhelmed with the past days. He told George that he remembered us coming to see him at Torez and described in detail a bit about our visit. He has incredible memory. He said that he had been waiting a long time and described it in a way as though he knew we would return. He kept his faith for it. He said that first we needed to get Maxim Ivanov (our Maxim at home) home and then we could come back for him. "I just had to wait a very long time." He has learned the fruit of patience. He is meeting the goodness of God in the land of the living. He doesn't know bitterness.
I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:13-14
The caregivers explained that all he talks about is his new mom and dad when we are away. He's dreaming and planning out loud. He's trying to gather all of his facts together and very concerned with details. Not worried concerned, but thoughtful concerned. "You will go to see Julia and then come back, right? How many days will that be? What time? What will we do?" He held my face in his hands over and over and then I did the same with him. He ran his hands through my hair and studied my face. After a big sigh, for the first time he said, I love you. While he had been hearing us say those words, this was his first and with it came a rush of emotions in his little heart and I thought he would burst!
But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you. Psalm 5:11
I brought cars and balls today. While he played with them, he seemed unfulfilled. He seemed a bit tired. Maybe bored. I asked the caregiver what he likes to do. She said, "Talk." She said he wants to talk about everything and know every detail about what things are and how they work. We asked him if he wanted to stop playing and he said, yes that he thought he had enough.
Causes you to look at things you once turned away from. And you look because its no longer fear of pain that rules you but the desire to see LIFE returned to the robbed one. And truth is, life spent in service for the lost (in whatever capacity) is the walk we were called to when we received our own adoption. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.... John 13:34
His love is whole. It cost Jesus all comforts and took Him to great grief so that victory would be eternal. Jesus' actions taught us that death was only conquered through love. And yet he experienced death first in his body to show us that our bodies were not what mattered most. I can risk loss and love deeply because LOVE does not die. In fact, it grows without limit because God is love. If only we will really grasp that our search for fleshly comfort is what keeps us from perfect security.
Surely God is my salvation;
I will trust and not be afraid.
The Lord, the Lord himself, is my strength and my defense;
he has become my salvation.”
With joy you will draw water
from the wells of salvation.
make known among the nations what he has done,
and proclaim that his name is exalted.