Day 14: A "Beautiful" Kind of Day
And Beautiful with Ira
I better back up to say that this morning was a rough start. The neighbor of mine had the television blasting so I put my earplugs in and then slept through the alarm this morning. I woke about 20 minutes before I had to leave so I forgot to pack the juice and food treats that Maxim loves so much. I wondered how Maxim would take this disappointment and how I was going to convey to him how I forgot. I put my hands together next to my head like I was sleeping and then yawned and opened my eyes, looked at my watch then screamed "machina to Maxim, machina to maxim" Vroom! Vroom! Well, it worked. They all understood me and we had a good laugh at how silly Mama is. Perhaps my efforts to convey what happened was a good enough to forgive me quickly. I was surprised he never really showed disappointment at all. In fact he said, "Mama, okay."
I didn't post yesterday mostly because I was working through little bits of sorrow and leaning on God. It was good, just not a posting kind of day. I had spent a good amount of time praying with Beautiful and Ira. I learned quickly that they knew God in heaven. Without words, you can feel worship. Ira went from reclusive and downcast face, to radiance. In prayer, I began crying which I did not plan to do in front of these girls. I was truly overwhelmed with them and their love for God that it sent me to humility so fast...so deeply. With some thoughts of my kids back home and missing Randy, I guess I was ripe.
But what happened next just killed me. They leaned over to me and wiped MY tears. I recovered quickly but I learned that the capacity for love can still thrive. These girls are longing to GIVE love! Not just to receive love but they too want to live freely and to have families, to nurture. They aren't looking for clothes, food, toys and all of the extra's. They really want to be loved and to give love. They want to be seen for who they are. Not a number sewn on their clothes. Not a diagnosis made years ago that determined their life course. Can you imagine? Can you imagine on your worst and weakest day being judged and labeled and for the rest of your life you live according to that day?
So all of this was my yesterday....
Come today, I wasn't surprised to find Ira and Beautiful waiting for me again, hoping to spend these two hours in hugs and prayer and worship again. Maxim is very close to Beautiful so he likes having her around.
I was playing ball with Maxim for a long while when I noticed Beautiful and Ira sitting together whispering a distance away. They looked sad watching us. Perhaps the better word is longing. They looked longingly. I knew what they were talking about. I heard those clue words, Mama, America, dom (home), love. Maxim came over to me and hugged me and said Mama Tina and Beautiful's face had a million expressions on it. God, please grant her miracle! When it was nearing time to go she came over to me and she hugged me but it was a different kind of hug. It felt like a plea for mercy on her life. She knows she only has until April to be adopted.
I don't know if you have heard or not that Ukraine has said they are putting a moratorium on adoptions. What that means exactly isn't known yet, but more will be known Dec. 17th when the next meeting is set to discuss this. Will you please be in prayer for this day? This will have a big impact on the older kids like Beautiful. Their clocks are ticking.
May the growns of the prisoners come before you;by the strength of your arm preserve those condemned to die. Psalm 79:11 The days of the blameless are known to the Lord, and their inheritance will endure forever. Psalm 37:18
With love and thankfulness, I pray you are overwhelmed with your heavenly Father's love today and that these days leading up to Christmas would be filled with thoughts of that love and the precious gift you have of your family. You are free to be loved and to give love. Do it generously and with joy in your hearts and watch what happens.
Sweetly wrapped in grace,